efforts of procrastination

i'm baaaaackkkk

2007-04-25T11:01:00.000-05:00

for a little while at least. i was just reading my old posts and realized a. i haven't written anything for almost a year and b. this is a good way for me to keep track of the many trivial events and thoughts that occur in my life.

bullet point list of what is new with me. its short i swear.

•greg and i broke, up and then got back together again. i promise you this is completely not like an annoying teenage soap opera where people do this all the time. at least i hope its not like one of those annoying teenage soap operas. i'm done talking about this now.

•i've accepted an offer from ohio state to enter their Master's program in Counseling psychology this fall. which means...i'm finally leaving pittsburgh. i dont hate it here, i swear. in fact i kinda like it. but anyone who knows me ever a tiny bit knows i'm a midwest girl. and no, despite claims, pittsburgh is not a midwest city. the midwest is flat. and traffic here sucks.

•i still am very much in love with wisconsin and madison and that will not ever change.

that is all. see, i'm boring.

more randomness later.

like golf? vaca to sheboygan

2006-05-23T10:38:00.000-05:00

props to my hometown for scoring a position in 7th on trip advisor's best WORLDWIDE golf vacations list. yeah, i bet people are reading that list saying to themselves, "sheboygan? wow, that sure is a fun word to say but where the hell is it?" and then maybe they'll remember that 2 years ago the PGA championship was there, and a few years before that the WPGA was there. and then yeah, suddenly sheboygan is the next hilton head. hilton head with some meth labs thrown in there for kicks anyway.

and this brings me to what i am still trying to grasp about my birth place: why the hell can't it just develop into something already?

its all there. we have one of the coolest marina's i've ever seen with miles of prime lake michigan beach front. 45 minutes from downtown milwaukee. amazing golf. kohler is right up the road and there is a kickass design center that has every one of their products on display. there's even an indoor waterpark. but it just can't seem to do anything productive with its old fashioned self. i'm beginning to think its aquiring all the problems of big city life (meth, burglaries, murder) without any of the benefits (tourists, nightlife, decent public transportation).

so if you like golf, go visit my home sweet home of 50,000 on the lake. and then go kick every single one of the city officials and tell them to try harder to market it dammit.

I ...

2006-05-19T14:48:00.000-05:00

...because its friday and i'm leaving for the airport in 1 hour to see my 2 best friends in the windy city.
...because it seems i never update anymore (i'm actually in the process of working on a new blog, details to follow when my thoughts are more coherent on the matter)
...because PW and Trouble are doing it which means all the cool kids are.
...but mostly because this blog is all about helping me procrastinate and this my friend is the most tell tale sign of procrastination:

I AM: amazed at the places we end up in life and how different they are from where we thought we'd be when we were kids.

I WANT: to know what i want to do with my 'life', where i want to go to school, what program i want to apply for, what type of job i'd be satisfied doing the rest of my life.

I HATE: that i get irritated at just about everything at any time and i hate how it has affected my relationships with people who i care about very deeply.

i'm also with trouble on this, "I'll also add on hate, bigotry, narrow mindedness, misinformation and the disability to try to understand the world"

I MISS: wisconsin, not necessarily the state though it is glorious, but my family and friends and the life i led when i lived there. not to mention the cheese. i miss CHEESE!

I FEAR: getting pregnant before i'm financially ready to have a child.

I HEAR: you when i want to hear you. but sometimes when you stop talking i hear you most.

I WONDER: if everything i've been taught in school is a lie. it seems experience tends to teach me otherwise.

I REGRET: that i can honestly say i've lost tough with the majority of my close friends from high school and college.

I AM NOT: a greenbay packers fan

I DANCE: always. when the music hits my soul i have no choice but to move.

I SING: a lot. i used to sing well. i'm afraid i don't anymore. i sing out loud in the car and at concerts. i sing the correct words to songs...most of the time.

I CRY: during almost every movie i see. and during the season finale of greys anatomy.

I AM NOT ALWAYS: a good friend. in fact sometimes i downright suck.

I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: scraves. its about the only thing i'm capable of knitting.

I WRITE: in all lowercase letters often times with minimal punctuation

I CONFUSE: effect and affect and all those stupid words that sound the same but are spelled different and have different meanings. the english language is a pain the ass.

I NEED: to trust in God more.

I SHOULD: floss daily but sometimes i forget.

I START: the coffee maker on a daily basis. and then i drink 3 cups of coffee. and without it i have terrible headaches.

I FINISH: when i'm good and ready and not before. yeah, that's a lie. i finish fast if someone is bugging the crap out of me to do it.

tagging ali, margy, and jessi. only if you have time and enjoy procrastinating much like me.

sometimes i lose my faith: reasons why meth sucks

2006-05-12T13:49:00.000-05:00

remember the days when trips to state parks used to be fun family activities? was it this way for you? my family was crazy about the state parks, for hiking, camping, swimming, picnics, and other miscellaneous activities. but i can assure you that one of those miscellaneous activities was not meth labs. i can't even tell you how disgusted i was by reading this article. its bad enough that these people do this crap in their homes in close proximity to their neighbors, nay, its bad enough that these people do this at all, but now they've infested some of the areas i go to in an effort to seek solice and peace and some good old fashioned fun? i remember as a kid, riding my bike up to the state park near my house (kohler andrae, then terry andre for you wisconsin people). i'd park the bike, and walk for miles on the trails feeling safe as a kitten drinking its mothers milk (i made that up just now, not sure where it came from). back then the only thing i was worried about was poison ivy. and suddenly now you are telling me that i need to be concerned about accidentally happening upon an explosive meth lab? people suck!
At one park, hikers found three bottles of drain cleaner, an empty gas can and a container with ammonia residue, police said.

who does this stuff? where does one go wrong in life to actually say, "hey, drain cleaner and ammonia sound like excellent things to ingest on a routine basis." the one thing i never understood about addictions is how people will willingly forgoe the basic human needs (food, shelter, water, etc.), things that are innate in most people, things that many people do not have but would like, in order to feed their addiction. and meth, well meth seems to take the cake of all addictions. and then mexico goes and does something that legalizes possession of drugs but not the selling of them. this makes NO sense to me. and please do not come to me with your ravings about how you believe that ALL drugs should be legalized in the US because things like meth are evil evil things and trust me, no matter how you fix it, drain cleaner and ammonia will NEVER agree with the insides of the human body so spare me your 'regulation' argument, this isn't coke we're talking about, its meth. you wanna see what this stuff does:
before 3 years later

Photo source: Oregonlive.com there are many more faces here if you are curious.

i'm not yelling at any one of you readers in particular. unless you use meth. in which case you're and idiot. this is mostly just an emotional vent about how trashed i think the human race is sometimes. trashed.

*i'd like to point out that at the top of the kohler andrea website it says "naturally air conditioned. see entry immediately below.

the woes of miss mandakay

2006-05-12T09:40:00.000-05:00

just taking a minute on this sucky sucky friday (i think it should be illegal for the weather to suck this much on a friday in may) to complain about all my ailments. i don't really care if you care, this is my personal therapy...

1. massive canker sore in my mouth that REFUSES to respond to treatment. this is my own fault. i bit down extra hard on my bottom gum last week while eating and whammo! canker appears. then because my stupid mouth isn't used to such deformities within it i keep biting the canker sore when i eat. thus its going nowhere anytime soon. i try to use orajel on it but i want to scream every time i put it on. cleaning it with peroxide and baking soda is also a death sentence. really, this small evil ulcer is putting me in a bad mood all around.

2. my hips, knees, thighs, and feet hurt. i decided to join the gym on saturday (before i heard about wonderful steven vaught--see below) because i'm .06 over the normal BMI for my height. i feel like i'm a lot more than .06 over because if you had said i was .06 over i really wouldn't care. but i feel like i'm 100 over and i'm tired all the time so i thought perhaps a little bit of aerobic apparatus might make me feel a bit better. so this is me: for about four days i run for about 10 minutes straight, walk a couple minutes, run for like 4 minutes then walk a couple minues. greg says i should increase my time by five minutes every 2 weeks to build endurance. but since i sometimes think i am god (i don't really think this christian friends of mine) i decide yesterday that i'm going to amp up to running for 19 consecutive minutes. no walking in between. because i am a rockstar thats why. and so i pay the price today with my whole body aching. to which bff amy says "that's good!" because apparently being in gut wrenchign pain from a workout says that you actually worked. a little pain, good. mandakay's pain, sucky.

3. have i mentioned the canker sore in my mouth yet?

4. i'm cold. i'm pretty much always cold though so this is nothing new. when i was little my mom thought i had anemia. i didnt know what that was, i thought it was some infestation that was taking over my body. i never got tested. so i might have anemia, i might not. my guess is not. if you ask me, rather than climatize to the cold wisconsin winters of my youth my body just stored up all that cold and releases it constantly. currently i have on a short sleeve tee, a hoodie, a jean jacket and a tee shirt over my feet (because i'm smart and know that most heat escapes your body through your head and feet). i hate air conditioning. absolutely hate it. window air conditioners i can stand, but central air really irks me. this is why: i like my air conditioning set at 74 degrees. that way it hardly ever runs which is great not only for the environment but also for my wallet. this means if its 92 degrees outside the air will run but if its 65 i can open the windows and enjoy nature's air conditioning. when i was growing up my family did not have air conditioning. most people did not have air conditioning in wisconsin. my mom always said the lake was the best form of air conditioning and it was free. i learned to love the light breeze as it entered my house and blew the windchimes haning in my window. i liked listening to the birds and smelling the flowers from outside. and i never got headaches. air conditioning gives me headaches like no other. it also makes me really sick as jumping from extreme climate conditions will do. suddenly though everyone has air conditioning. they pretend like this miami or dallas, or pheonix and we have summer for 12 months out of the year. this is pittsburgh for crying out loud. and yes it gets hot, but thats for like a month, maybe. the 'unbearableness' that you people percieve summer as is not heat, its humidity which coincidentally enough if one of the things air conditioning does relieve. but a dehumidifier will do the same thing, and not blow cold air on me all day long.

i do not by the way have air conditioning in my apartment. i use a fan in the window at night to keep me cool. its amazing how easy it is to keep a place cool if you do things like shut blinds and windows during the hot day and oopen them at night.

5. my canker sore still hurts.

thank you for listening.

walk forrest, walk!

2006-05-10T09:39:00.000-05:00

I get angry sometimes. well, lets be honest, i get angry a lot. i tend to yell at people and inanimate objects even though i know they can't hear me. driving is a whole separate issue and there have been multiple times where i've debated trading in my car because it seems like public transportation makes me less angry than driving. i stress myself out about things that are so trivial compared to the finer things in life. and then i read stories about Steve Vaught. Steve has lived one of my greatest nightmares...killing two elderly people with his automobile 15 years ago. i often wonder how people deal with something like that. Steve chose to eat. so much that he gained 150 pounds in the first 3 years after the accident. he went from a muscular marine to a morbidly obese 410 pound man who could not walk across a department store without getting winded. 15 years later Steve decided to do something about it in order to lose the weight and get his life back. he took 6 months off of work, meaning 6 months of no pay while his family struggled to make ends meet. his goal was simply to walk across the country. starting in oceanside, CA and ending in NYC. well it took a little longer than expected and 13 months later and over 100 pounds lighter Steve arrived in NYC. Steve did something that most of us are unable to do, he stopped feeling sorry for himself and did something about it. and now he has the priviledge of saying "yeah, i was feeling pretty bleak, but that walk across the country sure did wonders for me." Steve reminds us that life is about the risks, taking them is the only way we grow and move on. Steve reminds me that getting angry and annoyed about the small things is just dumb and that maybe i should use that energy toward something more proactive. i mean after all if a 410 pound man can walk across the country in a little over a year i'm sure i too can redirect my minor problems with everyday life (but i would like to add that i still think emersing yourself in a human sized goldfish bowl is a waste of energy).

On Wisconsin!

2006-05-04T08:40:00.000-05:00

a woman from madison.com emailed me yesterday and asked if she could have my permission to add my blog to a blog index on the website. i told her of course she did but was slightly confused because 1. my blog is not that great. 2. i live in pittsburgh now and was born in sheboygan and while i love madison with all my heart i only spent the most glorious 4 years of my life there and no more. 3. how did she find me?

so my dear longtime readers this means that i may need to step up the wisconsin banter. which shouldn't be too hard. madison.com rocks by the way. its like a one stop shop for all the city's news and events etc. ah, hell i'll spread some propaganda love: check it out...then go visit. its more than cheese and cows, i swear.

but speaking of cheese and cows. did you know sheboygan is known for the 5 'c's? yup, cheese, chairs, churchs, children, cows. y'all are like 'what the hell is sheboygan?' ahh, another story for another day folks.

so many fun things to post about today

2006-04-28T12:57:00.000-05:00

and the crazies keep on coming...

paperback writer, have you seen this craigslist add placed in the 'housing wanted' section yet?

have you ever noticed how a great majority of oddly enough stories come from the 'burgh?

2006-04-28T10:19:00.000-05:00

its like a book discussion only about this article...

1. (courtesy of kelly) who would kill a dog?
2. who would name a dog pimpin'?
3. do i really live in this city?
4. confused the dog for a person?
5. what would you dress your dog in after you bludgeon it to death?
6. one more time, do i really live in this city?

Random thoughts on a random friday

2006-04-28T08:49:00.000-05:00

can someone please explain to me why its cold out in the morning again? i have no desire whatsoever to turn in the flip flops again and the cold weather really isn't doing much for the cause.

on a happier note Pitt commencement is Sunday. Yay! i don't care about them graduating. plus the speaker kinda sucks. i care that they will all be done with finals and out of my way by monday. no more crowded bus, no more annoying undergrads romping around on the sidewalk. i hate how undergrads think they are sooooo cool all the time. and on another happy note after being here for 2 years i have just NOW realized there is an einstein bagels on campus...2 actually. so much better than brueggers. i really dislike breuggers and their $125 mugs.

i'm going to columbus this weekend. haven't been there since i was 16 probably. i debated wearing all my wisconsin garb. but i thought that might be mean. but then i remembered that its not like wisconsin is michigan so maybe it wouldnt be mean. oh, ohio state. buckeyes. what the hell is a buckeye anyway? (don't answer that. i know what a buckeye is. its a nut, or a tree, or the stupid mascot thing named brutus. people at ohio state get really defensive about this. i would too if i was up against the likes of the wolverine, bucky badger, and the hawkeye. at least goldie the golpher and the boilermaker make the brutus look a little tougher. i'm off topic aren't i?) when i think of ohio and say it in my head the only way i can say it is if i say it like the end of the drew carey show song 'cleveland rocks OHIO!' or like in the middle of the fifty nifty united states song. Oh-Hi-Oh... have you all heard that song? oh man, i can name all 50 states in alphabetical order in about 25 seconds thanks to that song.

i am apparently a year away from being 'old.' this line comes from a 17 year old who informed me yesterday that you have to celebrate your teenage years because once you turn 25 you're old. i remember when i had thoughts like that. of course given the choice now i can honestly say i'd rather be 25 than 18. you?

and speaking of old...sometimes grandmas rock! well grandmas rock all the time but these grannies are exceptionally cool.

and on that final note i'm out.

wisconsin people!

2006-04-25T14:54:00.000-05:00

i see you there...you think i don't know you are watching me but i do. i honestly don't really care that you are because i have nothing bad to say about people from wisconsin or the state itself. quite the contrary actually. but i'd really like it if you'd at least say hello. people in madison and milwaukee. someone at acuity (but i know who you are), someone with wisconsin newspapers, people who are facebook stalking me. yeah, i see you out there. you aren't the only one who stalks...

now say hello dammit!

honestly, i'm homeschooling my kids

2006-04-21T11:56:00.000-05:00

why?

ode to madison, wi/reasons why NOT to kidnap yourself

2006-04-21T11:19:00.000-05:00

in honor of the slightly past two year anniversary of one of the most chaotic events i had the chance to personally experience and the last show i watched on court tv i thought i'd send a public letter to one of the reasons humanity is dumb.

do we all know who audrey seiler is? forgive me for assuming we all do because seriously, if you do not, you SHOULD. quite simply dear old audrey forever has a darkspot in miss mandakay's heart as well as her other classmates at the university of wisconsin. it is not very nice to kidnap people, and its really not very nice to kidnap YOURSELF and then lie about it.

dear audrey, we were all very worried about you. and then they found you and you were okay and we all exclaimed "its a miracle she wasn't hurt, its a miracle she wasn't assulted, its a miracle the worst she suffered was dehydration." but then you told us that the abductor was still at large. and worse, you told us that he was at large a mile from my apartment, from the classes i walked to daily. and we were all scared. and the media came, and the badasses from police departments across the state and country came, and there were helicopters flying over the night sky to find you man so we could all feel safe again. because after all its the reason so many of us were there, we felt safe in madison. audrey, it wasn't very nice when we found out later that you abducted yourself. scared us all to death, first that you weren't okay, then that someone was still at large. you costed the city thousands of dollars and instilled fear in thousands of people.

i watched your story on court tv last night. i saw all the people who helped search for you. saw the elated faces of your friends and family when they found you. i heard the nice police man explain that madison is lucky enough to see less than 10 murders a year and hasn't seen a kidnaping in years. and the best part was when the policeman said that if this ever happens again the people of madison will respond the same way, with concern and effort to find the missing person. audrey, don't get any ideas. next time try talking to your boyfriend about why he's writing provacative emails to other girls. and maybe you should stop reading his email to begin with.

its o.k. i'm sure there's a place for you somewhere. just not in madison anymore. which kinda sucks for you huh, because i hear its pretty cool. especially in the spring.

sincerely
~mandakay

(note that when i googled her to find a site to hyperlink to her i found her wikipedia site. holy shit! someday i too would like to do something worthy of someone wikipedia-ing me, though i hope it does not involve kidnapping myself, or being kidnapped at all for that matter).

HOLY CRAP!

2006-04-19T13:32:00.000-05:00

i got an email from my cousin, who needs to start updating her blog, containing this picture:

now i'm thinking, woah, someone is an ace with photoshop. real live easter bunny like. but me, being the snopes addict that i am decide to check it out for myself. so expecting to see false in the status line i look up 'easter bunny' and to my amazing surprise see that the legend is indeed TRUE! this bunny is 3 feet tall on his hind legs and weighs 17 pounds. this picture is REAL. two words come to mind: HOLY CRAP! its like living with alice in wonderland. i mean come on, giant rabbits are a thing for fiction. how do these things breed? this rabbit is bigger than my last cocker spaniel and that scares the crap out of me. right now i'm looking out my office door picturing a regular rabbit hopping around. very cute. i'd pick it up and care for it. now i'm picturing a ginorous rabbit hopping around (when you are that large can you really hop?) and honestly, i think i'd run. well if i could get out of my office without it seeing me. because giant rabbits are like giant bugs. they shouldn't exist. its not NORMAL. a giant rabbit like that is capable of attacking. seriously scary scary crap here people. i mean, come on...what if you saw a giant rabbit scampering across your freshly cut grass. see? scary.

MistaRuddy

2006-04-17T07:25:00.000-05:00

completely meant to post about this earlier but i'm an idiot and did not.

greg's very talented friend matt will be in town tomorrow evening to perform at the Club Cafe. matt goes by the name mistaruddy and is really good. likened to dave matthews band meets jack johnson meets ben harper. he's currently located in nyc and has quite a following out there. show starts at 7pm with a $10 cover (and well worth it). i urge you all to check out matt at www.mistaruddy.com or www.myspace.com/matthewbrianruddy and then stop by the Club Cafe tomorrow night for an evening of quality music. i PROMISE you will not be disapointed!

humanity = stupid

2006-04-13T10:05:00.000-05:00

alas today was the day of my hearing. i took the EBS downtown because no way was i going to deal with traffic and driving at the working hour of 8:30. i don't work downtown. the only time i go down there is when i'm driving through to go home or during an event. but i do know my way around. i've always been an expert when it comes to navigation. anyway, i got off the bus and walked the 10 blocks or so to the court building on 1st ave. people, downtown is exciting during the day! there are actually people milling around drinking coffee, smoking cigarettes. its like a real live city during the day. i seriously did not want to leave the presence of it. much more exciting than collegey oakland, land of the undergraduate.

have any of you ever been to the municipal court building? at first i thought it was scary (and i had to surrender my only form of protection pepper spray for the time being). it was pure chaos. there were so many people! i gave the nice people my name and they instructed me to wait in the court room. when i got in there what i saw was what looked like a scene out of a tv court show like judge judy only the chairs we got to sit in were plastic and everyone was talking. i tried hard to listen to the cases that the judge went through because i really like confirmation that humanity is stupid but it was too loud to hear most of it. but i'm sure it was all very exciting and dramatic.

finally around 9:30 the detective calls me out to the waiting area to talk to me. he told me that my criminal (yes, he's mine now, i claimed him) was meeting with his lawer and another to discuss a plea. his exact words to me "we're dealing with a dumb stoned serial burglar here." oh how i love to hear about the druggies. makes me so happy i say no to drugs like my D.A.R.E officer told me to in 5th grade. the detective told me he suspected mr. robber would take the plea and that i would be sent home shortly if that was the case. now i'm thinking to myself "don't be so sure detective. druggie = stupid. he might think he can still get off."

detective comes back a few minutes later. i'm slouched against a wall bored out of my mind and he tells me that there is a building being renovated just across the street and a construction worker pushed the button to call the lift and when it didnt come he stuck his head out to see it and was decapitated. when i put my hand over my mouth in shock and horror he says to me "oh, i didnt mean to upset you." mr. detective = stupid. come on, i'm a girl, i'm currently waiting to testify against a strange drug addict who entered my apartment with force, like i'm not going to get upset over what he just told me? i mean the man probably has a family, kids. he probably came to work this morning like he did every other day. he was probably wondering what his wife was going to make for dinner. YES I WAS UPSET!

i digress.

finally around 10am, the detective comes back and tells me i'm free to go. stupid drug addict robber has miraculously taken the plea so i won't have to testify and see his slimy face. he'll be recieving 10 years in jail after confessing to over 100 burglaries in the past year. i am also informed at this point that he was in jail six years ago for a few years for the same thing. drug addict robber = really really stupid.

so, out of 100 burglaries how many people showed up you ask? just me. yup, i rock like that. burglary victims = stupid.

humanity did not score a whole lot of points with me today. of course its not even the lunch hour yet, i guess it has chance to redeem itself. although in order for that to happen i should probably stay away from CNN.com. and you...well you should stay away from drugs.

my fashion faux pas

2006-04-11T09:59:00.000-05:00

in honor of the 73 degrees and sunny weather in today's forcast (toto, i don't think we're in pittsburgh anymore) i decided to don my spunky yellow capris and fun flip flops. HOWEVER just because the outside air is supposed to be 73 degrees and sunny apparently does not mean my office will be. so i'm sitting here cross legged in my desk chair with a long sleeve shirt over my legs and freezing feet. although i guess that's my own fault.

you better believe i'm going outside at lunch just to warm up.

and yes i can wear things such as capris and flip flops at my job. i can also wear jeans and sweatshirts. and no i do not work in any such place as a clothing store or fast food restaurant. the glory of education i guess.

i do solemly swear...

2006-04-08T11:44:00.000-05:00

...to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.

just got word yesterday from mr. cop man that i'll have to testify next thursday morning. i've never been in court before. i'm so nervous. the cop said all i have to do is just say what it was that was stolen and he will take care of the rest. they are calling this man a serial burglar and are charging him with all 3 counts in my building. not sure how long they hope to put him away for but i'll be a happy girl if he does not get out before i move.

any suggestions for my court appearance?

ooh pretty

2006-04-07T12:54:00.000-05:00

in light of recent blogger friends changing their blogs, i too decided to do some spring cleaning. the title of this template is called "persnickety" and i really like that word. forgive me as i work out kinks in the next few weeks (like how to post my profile in the large open space on the right) and please enjoy my pretty new look.

spring savvy

2006-04-06T11:26:00.000-05:00

*my apologies in advance if i offend anyone by this entry.

alright, so the dumb 40 degree weather has hopefully disappeared until next fall when i will allow it to return only after bearing the hot humidity of summers in pittsburgh. hopefully. but with the warmer weather comes some horrible taste in fashion that i feel i must address here. my hope is that none of you commit such atrocious crimes but again, i am sorry if i do offend you so.

i by no means am miss fashionista guru but i must point out a few simple rules to follow when the warm weather hits us:

1. UGGs were invented to be used year round in places like the adirondack where its always cold and people need them to keep their feet warm (which in turn keeps the body warm). they were invented to be used in places like pittsburgh (and for all intensive purposes, wisconsin) during the WINTER to keep feet warm with PANTS. i don't want to see you dumbasses wearing them with skirts in the spring and fall because if its cold enough to wear the boots i hate so much then its cold enough to wear pants. if you pair these boots with oversized bug-eyed sunglasses then you are a huge dumbass. at UW we have a name for you, its coastie (read number 2 in link).

2. the guys might go crazy when the weather warms up because it means the girls are wearing less clothes. by nature this, of course, is necessary. but please do not wear shirts and shorts that are 8 sizes too small for you because NO ONE wants to see that.

3. i am an advocate of the flip flop BUT please take care of your feet if you are going to done such sole bearing accoutrements.

with your cooperation amanda will be spared much annoyance. thanks ever so much!

may a house fall upon you

2006-04-03T12:50:00.000-05:00

this is why i dislike spring. in general i love spring. and i love that as of yesterday it stays lighter out for a whole hour later now. i love that i'm seeing green and flowers, and most important i love that its finally warm. but i HATE tornados. they might be the single one thing that freaks the crap out of me. still. i remember when i was younger my grandma tried to explain to me what a tornado was, "its like a funnel that destroys things." somehow i couldn't get past destroyed and didn't fully understand what funnel meant so i envisioned this giant state puff marshmallow like man who walked around cities crushing houses. i'd have dreams about this tornado man. i don't think he ever talked though, just walked around stomping things.

when i finally realized what they were (thank you wizard of oz) i'd run for dear life down to the basement every time the airraid sirens went off screaming at my parents to follow suit. once my dad told me he heard them go off in the middle of the night but didn't want to wake my mom and i. i was pissed. even when they sirens weren't going off i'd stare intently at the corner of the TV where the networks had their crazy t-storm and tornado images along with the cities scrolling across to warn of the doom that was in store. maybe this is when i started biting my nails. in school we'd have tornado drills so we'd be prepared if one ever struck. sometimes we'd be fortunate enough to end up in an eclosed space. sometimes they'd tell us just to duck under our desks and put our coats on our heads. looking back i now realize that had a tornado actually come through our school those of us unlucky enough to be stuck under our desks probably stood little chance of survival.

i was always told that living so close to one of the great lakes (i grew up a mile from lake michigan) was good because the lake deterred tornados. i don't know how exactly but i'm pretty sure i thought the tornados were scared of water. maybe there's some truth to the above mentioned statment. all i know is that in my 24 years of existance i've only heard of 1 or 2 tornados passing through my hometown and only hitting a large state park destroying little of anyone's personal property. i've never seen one live and can't imagine what i'd do if i did.

i have nightmares about these things, frequently. in my dreams i'm always up high in a building and the sun is shining and out of now where the funnel cloud forms and seems to chase me. sometimes i have no choice but to jump out windows, other times i make it to safety only to come back and find that my house is the only one that has been destroyed. some people take pictures of these things. i stay inside and count down the minutes until the warning/watch is over.

maybe it was the wizard of oz that contributed to this fear. i never really like oz. the munchkins scared me. and if dorothy could wind up there simply by riding her house over the rainbow during a tornado whose to say i wouldn't end up there too.

i hate them. but i suppose i'd rather be in pittsburgh hating tornados than in miami hating hurricanes.

criminals are stupid

2006-03-27T15:56:00.000-05:00

well except for maybe the white collar kind who have JDs and MBAs. but even they are probably stupid beyond IQ.

they caught my burglar. i'm estatic only in the fact that he's currently in jail and will hopefully be there until i move. i'm not estatic because i have to testify AND i still probably will not get my stuff back. but they caught him, and they were able to link them back to me which gives me some satisfaction because clearly he is stupid and at least this time around law enforcement is doing its job. this makes up for the lack of job doing they did when my car was smashed up.

here's the story:

at eat and park with greg and maria on friday night. get phone call from cop. cop asks me if i lost any mail. i honestly do not know being that i'm the worst person at keeping track of paper records. why is everything not online anyway? cop asks me if i deal with state farm and indeed i do and would not deal with any one else when it comes to matters of my car. asks me if i am from wisconsin. well yes, yes as a matter of fact i am. oh stupid stupid man held onto my insurance statement for reasons i do not know (unless he got wind of the fact that my parents living in wisconsin are secret millionaires and planned to go pay them a visit). turns out that they caught said perp in the act of burglarizing yet another residence and got a search warrant for his house. now i have to say that seems a little bit ironic in a way. dude enters others' homes and takes stuff and now cops enter his home but must get permission first. so they enter with their badass warrant in a way that in my mind i'm going to believe was like some mad bust in law and order because it makes the whole thing seem so glamourous. they enter his house and they find this random statement. and at first i'm sure they are like "who the hell is this chick, she must be in on it. to wisconsin we go!" but then my cop says "hey guys, wait just one sec, that's one of my victims. ahoy, we've linked more crimes to the perp!" and he calls me. he said, and this is a direct quote which i love, he said, "this opens up a whole new can of worms." how awesome is that? because dumbass criminal takes my old school bookbag with an insurance statement that my mom presented me with while i was visiting them in florida and because he doesn't believe in using a trash can like normal people the cops have now linked him to my neighborhood and who knows how many other crimes there. see what i mean? stupid. not that i'm complaining.

turns out that yes, there have been quite a few of the same sorts of crimes in my neighborhood in recent weeks including 2 successfull and one attempted burglary just in my building of six apartments. but then mr. cop tells me that once they get more information they will be calling me back because i need to testify that my stuff was taken. he also said that they were looking into where he sold my computer. but what i am most interested in is how much he got for my computer so i can point and laugh and be like, man way to waste your time hitting my apartment because not only did you get like .02 for a six year old computer with 12 GB of space running 98 but you also got yourself more time because you hung on to my insurance statement (sentimental value?). i have no more to say to you except go smoke your crack somewhere else.

coolest thing since the virgin mary on a grilled cheese sandwich

2006-03-24T10:16:00.000-05:00

its time, my friends, to give you a slew of links to check out once again. and you better check them out. because quite frankly they WILL change your lives. all of them.

gizoogle.com : gizoogle your morning news. you'll never read a dull news story again!
sloganizer : type in your name, your favorite food, the song you sing in the shower every morning, anything...it sloganizes it just for you!
and my personal favorite of the morning, Pandora : go here, tell them an artist you really dig, the find more music of the same for you to listen to ala live365 or launchcast only way cooler!

peace, i'm out. for now.

how to minimize the size of my inbox

2006-03-22T11:05:00.000-05:00

i use gmail. that thing will never be full because as of right now i have almost 3 GB and it grows daily. the fullness of my inbox is not the point. gmail rocks because i never have to delete anything so if i ever need to reference something all i do is type what i'm looking for in the search box and up it comes. i love my gmail account. i love my friends with gmail because i can see when they are online checking their email and then i can talk to them. you all should get gmail. what i DO NOT love is my family (my friends know better, at least most of them do) who continue to send me fowards, you know the ones with the subject lines that look like this "fwd: fwd: RE: FWD: the world is ending at exactly 10 pm on oct 10" despite my repeated pleas for them to knock it off. i HATE forwards. i hate that you have time to hit the 'forward' button on your email, or fill out a survey that tells me the last three things you ate for breakfast but you do not have time to send me a real email or better yet, pick up the phone and call me. what are you doing? you are adding to the flood of emails i get daily and making it hard to see things that are important like the lastest gossip from my girl amy. so let me give all of you a tip...i know that none of you are adding to the crap in my inbox but you might be adding to the crap in someone elses inbox. you might be one of those people like my family who gets an email telling you that if you don't pass it on to 8 billion people in the next two seconds you will have bad luck in this life and 5 lifes after. you might be one of those people who gets an email quoting some famous person saying how he believes that things should be different in America or from some rich guy saying if you pass it on his monopoly of a company will trace it and send you a check for 1.2 million dollars and you can retired at the age of 14. you know what i do when i get these? 'archive' (in gmail it takes too much effort to delete). if you ever get one of these types of emails from me its because i was smart and went to Snopes to check it out in the rumor mill. please, blog friends of mine, use snopes before passing on useless emails that tend to get everyone riled up in a tizzy. if you send an email that says a plane will drop $100 bills from the sky on friday make sure you check to see if the lovely people at snopes did the research for you on its truth. if it says 'false' don't pass it on. the world is already full of enough stupid people, enough junk mail, and enough spam. YOU can do your small part by not contributing to any of the above.

thank you for listening to this public service announcement concerning my obnoxious inbox.

bad week to decide to stop biting my nails

2006-03-20T15:31:00.000-05:00

i was doing well...i really was. i painted my nails on friday and made the comment to greg on sunday that all the nail polish was still on. currently: none remains. had a great time in baltimore, wish this post was about that. its not, this post is about this morning. this post is about my computer not being where it should be. this post is about how random people are sometimes.

i came home from greg's this morning to get ready for work. i pretty much never sleep at home for a few reasons #1 being that quite simply i do not feel safe there. my neighbor's apartment was broken into a few weeks back and while all they took was his mug of change some strange person was still walking around in his apartment while he was away at work. so i hadn't been home since friday afternoon. i throw my stuff down on the couch and take a shower. go into my room to get dressed and notice that my laptop is curiously missing from my desk. i think that perhaps my roommate needed it for something but then realize that jessi is not an idiot and of course would have called or left a note "hey girl, needed the laptop for a project, will bring home later." remembered how my neighbor said that the only thing missing from his apartment was his change. looked in the container (coincidentally i keep it rigth by where my computer sits) with my change. nothing. gone. all of it. realize that yes, i have been robbed. call jessi. she tells me to check the status of her ipod. its still there, in plain view. tv, dvd player, movies, cds, 14k gold necklaces...all still in place. my computer, a knapsack, and spare change? gone. none of this matters to me. my computer is 6 years old and doesn't really work anymore, i hadn't plugged it in in ages and save for 1,000 songs on the harddrive there was nothing of value on it. what pisses me off is first and foremost that SOMEONE WAS IN MY APARTMENT! and that someone took a bag that had a cd with all my digital photos on it and my GRE book and cdrom. what pisses me off is that now i really do not feel safe in my apartment that does not have a deadbolt on the door. what pisses me off is that i have to compromise a little bit of my happiness and sanity to accomodate some probably crack addict who needed a quick fix. and what pisses me off is that this is now the second time in a year tha t a piece of my personal property has been violated by a stranger (there's an entry someone here about my poor cavalier and her devastation). what is wrong with this city? someone needs to fix it! or i just might be one more statistic that contributes to the declining population.

i only hope my nails grow back soon.

Luck 'o the Irish to you...

2006-03-17T13:13:00.000-05:00

Happy St. Patrick's Day folks. this holiday has never meant anything to me. sometimes i wear green, sometimes i don't. one time i went to chicago to drink green beer and watch the ducks swim in the green river, that was fun. see below (with college friends bethany and mike):

but most of the time its just another day. today for instance i'm not wearing green, unless you count my columbia fleece. i'm wearing a long sleeve badger shirt because its flippin cold in pittsburgh (take note that i'm wearing capris in above picture) and my boys are struggling to beat AZ in the first round of the tourney right now. the luck of the irish clearly is not with wisconsin today. perhaps i should have attended notre dame as my sophomore in high school self had wanted. wait, they aren't even in the tourney. they're just irish.

so how will mandakay spend her st patty's day you ask? probably with a good book, some knitting and a cup of starbucks joe. me and the gregster must hit the open road early tomorrow to make it to baltimore at a decent hour to commence drinking with his buddies, an annual tradition. i don't quite get it as i feel that most places the festivities were last weekend (i don't get that either, but i guess its like that year that halloween fell on a friday and everyone was confused as to when wisconsin was going to celebrate the damn holiday. for the record we celebrated both weekends, would you expect anything less?). so tomorrow i'll don my green attire and drink some green alcohol and pretend like tomorrow is the real deal. and maybe somewhere in there i'll remember that this is actually a Christian holiday that is actually quite meaningful (history). but right now, at this moment on this st patty's day, i'm going to choose to be mad at ohio state and wisconsin for not SUCKING IT UP and destroying their opponents.

WISCONSIN...

2006-03-17T13:01:00.000-05:00

STEP IT UP!!!!!

thankyou

Bracketology

2006-03-16T15:12:00.000-05:00

Happy March Madness day! if you need me for the next three weeks you'll be able to find me zoned out in front of the computer intently watching the scores on ESPN.com . Go Badgers! um, at least for a little while i guess. and then, go anyone but the Blue Devils. Duke is like Michigan. does anyone actually like them other than its own students and alum. ps, i hate bandwagon fans. DON'T CHEER FOR DUKE JUST BECAUSE THEY MAKE IT TO THE FINAL FOUR EVERY YEAR, or because you think JJ Redick is hot. Uh Un. Find another team to cheer for, say, maybe, i dunno, Wisconsin?

btw, in the one bracket i filled out, no number 1 seed is making it to the final four. i'm all about the upsets.

fyi coffee addicts

2006-03-15T10:47:00.000-05:00

free coffee at starbucks between 10 and 12 today!

who am i?

2006-03-15T10:01:00.000-05:00

is the picture of me on the left not the scariest thing ever?

nail biter

2006-03-14T14:59:00.000-05:00

i bite my nails which is annoying to other people, but trust me i'm sure it annoys me the most. i dont know what it is but for as long as i can remember i have been putting things in my mouth. i hate freud but i truly believe perhaps i was indeed fixated at the oral stage. so anyway, i bite my nails and right now i'm a little stressed out about some things which means i'm going to bite them more than i already do. and in a couple hours my fingers will undoubtably hurt and i'll curse the fact that i cannot keep my fingers out of my mouth for 2 seconds. and ewwww, this is probably the most disgusting of habits and i know all this but yet i cannot stop.

remedies...anyone?

things i'm growing to love:

2006-03-09T15:52:00.000-05:00

powerade option fitness water. beats the crap out of propell
my ipod. oh who am i kidding, i've loved the ipod from the day i brought it home.
the fray. music group from denver. sound kinda like train but not really. check them out on
itunes. might be the end of my bank account.
Newman's Own Rasberry Walnut salad dressing. you can't find it in pittsburgh people, so don't even try.
fiona apples new cd, extraordinary machine. its like jazz with pizzazz.
"Blue Like Jazz" by donald miller. quick entertaining read for my Christian friends, and maybe even my non Christian friends.

where have i been? boycotting technology

2006-03-09T08:34:00.000-05:00

sometimes it takes a nice friendly kick in the butt to remind me that i should maybe update so people don't begin to think i've fallen off the face of the planet (thanks pghcitiboy). of course at this point it would take a lot more than updated blogs for people to stop thinking that seeing as how AIM, email, and the phone have suddenly become like foreign objects to me. my appologies to all. i don't know what it is but lately most thing technology have just not been appealing to me, including the TV (*gasp!). of course i do blame aaron spelling for that one being that ever since 90210 went off the air there is just nothing worth watching...i kid, i kid. but in all seriousness, truth be told, i don't even use my car that much anymore. in fact on my return trip yesterday from McKeesport where i've been teaching 4th graders the joy and amazment of community service i began to sincerely hate all things driving. it doesn't help that the majority of people in this city drive for crap, we're talking worse than illinois here.

so as for me, that is where i have been, in the spiritual sense anyway. in the physical sense i've been in florida for the past week. will post pictures and write about fun times with the family in a later entry.

as for you, what do you make of this sudden distaste for modern conviences?

i'd be the happiest girl ever if...

2006-02-23T16:37:00.000-05:00

all 10 seasons of these guys were released any day now...

sometimes i really hate aaron spelling. how bout you?

bye bye rental stores!

2006-02-20T15:05:00.000-05:00

<------ greatest concept ever!

do you have netflix? if so please let me know so i may add you to my 'friends' list so we can dish about movies and send recommendations to eachother.

yeah, already established that i'm a big dork.

...in bed

2006-02-16T09:50:00.000-05:00

to help you all celebrate the day after the day after the halmark holiday i thought i'd share with you all a fun recipe. this recipe is for all of you who hate those damn fortunes in the fortune cookies at chinese restaurants (except chino latino. those fortunes rock.) anyway, now you can make your own fortune cookies and put your own fortunes in them. for instance you might make one for your sweetheart that says "i'll love you til the end of time" but do provide them with a bucket in case sudden nausea hits. or you could make one for your arch enemy that says "today heavy large blunt objects will fall on your head." you see, the possibilities are endless. so put your cooking skills and that creative mind to work and whip up a batch of your very own fortune cookies for that special someone, whoever it may be!

2 egg whites
1/8 tsp vanilla
1/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup flour
dash of salt

preheat oven to 400 degrees.

in one bowl mix the sugar, flour and salt. in another bowl mix the egg whites and vanilla until foamy but not stiff (i don't have a hand mixer so i used an egg beater which worked well). sift the sugar/flour mixture into the egg whites and mix. on a WELL GREASED cookie sheet drop two spoonfuls of batter about 2 inches apart. tilt the cookie sheet so that the batter spreads evenly in a circle and thins. it should be almost transparent. bake at 400 degrees for about 5 minutes, checking periodically. the edges should turn golden, the middles will stay white.

remove from oven. use a wide spatula to remove the cookie from the sheet and place it on a wooden cutting board. put fortune in the middle of the circle and fold in half. pinch two parts together and fold in half again over a bowl. place in cupcake holder or egg carton to hold shape.

this might require some trial and error. if cookies are getting too hard lower the baking temp. see my yummy picture below for proof that this recipe indeed works!

mmmm, yummy...

gone are the days of halmark cards

2006-02-14T16:38:00.000-05:00

in honor of my least favorite holiday i thought i might give those last minute gift hunters a suggestion. ladies, why not re-virginize yourself this year for valentine's day? ahhh, the true spirit of love making and creating...

oooh, when you google 'valentine's day' a pretty heart border comes up on the right side. DO IT!

me and my terrible tahl

2006-02-06T10:43:00.000-05:00

i'll spare you all the boring chants. we all know pittsburgh won the super bowl blah blah blah blah blah.

if you want to read about that excitement catch it from one of the other million blogs out there screaming about it. am i happy they won? sure. did i cheer for them? of course. currently my throat hurts and i have no voice. BUT...am i sad that hopefully this city will resume to some sense of normalcy and non chaos? certainly not. i say, bout damn time.

i think more worthy of note here than the steelers winning is the fandamonium from yours truly. pics to prove:

and a bathtub full of alcohol...

in a four star hotel

and that is all i have to say about that.

i think you should know...

2006-02-02T10:18:00.000-05:00

...that my favorite beer EVER is now being served on tap at various locations throughout western PA. thank you jacob leinekugel and chippewa falls, wi for providing this humble part of the country with the sweet honey taste of the northwoods. and thank you miller brewing company for buying such a wonderful microbrewery thus allowing it to branch out and share its wonderfulness with an ever increasing part of the country. i am truly grateful to all who have aided in a small taste of home being delivered to my backyard.

now, pittsburgh people...GO GET IT! i know hemingways in oakland has it. probably several other places as well.

google me

2006-02-02T10:10:00.000-05:00

question:

why is the most googled subject of my blog the lyrics to Keane's "everybody's changing" which takes you to this entry about a night out in my hometown?

pressure in the Lord's house

2006-02-01T13:59:00.000-05:00

my pastor asked me on sunday if i wouldn't mind preparing something to say to the church this coming sunday about the ways the Lord has been working in my life. i was at the same time both honored and confused by such a request. its not everyday that the pastor asks someone to discuss this on a personal level with the congregation but at the same time a part of me felt like i was an unlikely candidate for such a discussion. surely there are people in my church who can talk about what the Lord is doing for them better than i can. surely they have more interesting stories of grandeur than mine. but my pastor feels i'm qualified for the task and so i guess i can't let him down, huh?

its been a while since i've given a speech, or stood in front of a public audience and professed something. so i'm a little nervous. and a part of me is worried i will say the wrong thing, or interpret something wrong, or not have enough support. go me, still feeling like i'm giving a presentation in college or presenting a psych poster in front of a hundred really important PIs who know a hundred times more than me. but its true. when it comes the realm of religion all i know is how i feel, basically. sure it will be really easy for me to make a bulleted list "the Lord is working in my life in this way this way and this way" but i am not at the point where i am able to pull out my bible and open to the Psalms or Gospels and reference how that supports it (i still can't even pull out my bible and locate the appropriate gospel in the appropriate testament). and because of these reasons i'm slightly intimidated to get up in front of all these people who have found their faith long before i have, who live as much better Christians than me, who are a million times more conservative than my liberal minded self and talk about only what my heart is feeling.

and so i ask for your prayers as i prepare whatever it is i decide i'm going to say this sunday. and maybe, perhaps if you feel so inclined, share some way the Lord has been working in your life recently (i promise i won't steal it as my own...) as some encouragement.

blog blog blog blog blog blog blog

2006-02-01T09:44:00.000-05:00

i'm adding two new blogs to my list, mostly for my own sanity so i can access them with ease, but feel free to check out Pgh Guy's Online Dating Blog and Mutually Assurred Destruction.

~mandakay

oscar's all dressed up but nobody gets him

2006-01-31T17:05:00.000-05:00

am i the only one who, upon reading the nominees for the academy awards, has heard of only one movie? who is on this academy and where are these movies playing that i don't know about them? i think if i were to make a movie about something very abstract and not publicize it at all and only show it in one theatre in a very very remote part of the country, say Wausaukee, WI, and then send that film to the academy that perhaps i too might stand a good chance at winning. but here is my favorite. every year i watch the 26 and a half hour long award shows and sit through the long boring speeches and feel real bad when the orchestra cuts off people just as they are thanking God or when joan rivers nose falls off and every year i see who wins the big ones and scratch my head in confusion and then run out to blockbuster and rent said title. and every year i am disapointed. i'll take anchorman anyday. because 10 years later who's talking about the english patient. billy madison on the other hand...classic (by the way i want you all to know i guessed on the years of those two movies and upon imdbing them find out i'm correct on time frame. i'm a genius. put me on the academy please).

am i alone on these thoughts? anyone...anyone...

not an uplifting post but worthy or note anyway

2006-01-26T13:12:00.000-05:00

a couple months ago i posted about winter driving safety. perhaps i posted slightly prematurely as obviously we all know that january and february hail snow more than december does. last night i was awarded the first opportunity of watching non-educated drivers drive in winter conditions. Dane Cook (ooh, i should really link him over in my ways to procrastinate area huh?) has so elequently expressed on both of his CDs that Americans love car accidents. this is why i love him. he states the obivious. oh Dane, you are my hero.

let me first just say that a car accident could have been me last night. upon the conclusion of my 6 minute tanning session at Hollywood Tans (i do this for sanity reasons of needing ultra violet light, not for vanity reasons of wanting to look pretty. oh who am i kidding, i do it for those reasons too) i was driving down Ellsworth Ave in shadyside. Ellsworth Ave at 6pm in snowy weather = BIG sheet of ice. Why is this? i'm in a populated neighborhood, during rush hour, and its been snowing since 2pm. have we not figured out yet that salters would be a good idea? anyway, the lesson learned from that story is that my car does not have anti lock brakes. yet one more reason why i miss my cavalier. yes, its been a year, no i'm still not over her. the malibu on the other hand slid all over the road. suprisingly i did not panic. probably because there was nothing in sight for me to hit. anyway, i just wanted to point out that i was not an accident case last night. whew.

real story. i park at greg's. greg lives on a tiny 2 way street with parking on both sides. and to make things worse, non pittsburgh natives, people in pittsburgh park both ways on either side of the street. people in pittsburgh: this is weird in case you didn't know. so i park. get out of the car and hear a car shuffling down the road. yes, i said shuffling. i do not believe she had even applied the gas. car skids. i hear "crack." i stop. i stare. go to dane cook's site above. except that by 'crack' i really mean thud or whatever sound plastic makes when its being hit. i'm fully prepared to take down license plate numbers thinking surely the person will not stop. but she did. got out of the car, inspected the hit vehicle, and upon finding no damages left the scene. i think i should buy a saturn. that was the most amazing trick i've ever seen. perhaps my poor cav would still be here today if she were plastic. oh wait, she was still hit with such velocity that she spun out into the middle of the street from her perfectly parallel parked position.

thank you girl in car who slid into other car for doing the appropriate thing and inspecting damage. no thank you stupid people who fled the scene after destroying my baby.

and one more time, just in case you missed it the first time around, or cannot seem to locate it in my archives: PLEASE READ FOR MY SAFETY AND YOURS THIS WINTER!

uplift me please

2006-01-26T11:19:00.000-05:00

can someone please share something uplifting with me. i'm afraid the only news and stories i've gotten this morning have been negative.

thanks much,
-the management.

comment deficiency

2006-01-25T12:42:00.000-05:00

So I have to appologize. I was yelling at you all asking you to comment. Feeling very much unloved because my comment section was blank on all my posts. Feeling like I was writing to no one :(. And then I realized I had comment moderation on. Did not know this thus because I had not approved any of your lovely and thoughtful comments I was unable to see them. I truly am sorry for my dumbass mistake and assure you that my comment wall is fixed and open for posting. So keep sending me your thoughts on my lame posts because it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I promise from now on they will actually show up.

Charlton Heston would be pleased

2006-01-25T10:13:00.000-05:00

Okay Okay so I try to leave my political beliefs out of my blogging, mostly because I feel there are enough blogs out there that express them for me, but I absolutely feel the need right now to profess my leftist stand on guns. No I did not just recently see Bowling for Columbine for the 15th time. My need to address this issue comes from a more "people are stupid approach." It also comes purely from a rant on my account so forgive me if I miss some details or fail to mention others. Just getting it off my chest.

exhibit a.

Read an article on CNN this morning about an 8 year old boy who shot a 7 year old girl in the arm at a daycare after bringing his father's gun to school. The girl is fine, thankfully. But I can't help but pose the age old question "what was an 8 year old doing with a gun?" Lets pretend, just for one moment, that the 8 year old is free of blame, that he lacks the complete common sense neccesary to make the decision that it is unwise to bring a gun to daycare for show and tell. Lets pretend the 8 year old assumes the gun is a toy and knows not what he does. What kind of father leaves a weapon in wide open spaces for his kid to do with as he pleases? Um, well, probably a father with "an extensive criminal record dating to the 1960s, according to court documents. It includes several convictions of assault with intent to maim and gun charges." Wow, healthy. Alright, my right wing friends may argue that this may be a case of illegal weapon attainment on the father's part, which yes is probably the case. It is probably also the case that both father and son are psychologically devoid in some area and require more help than the state can offer. But an 8 year old still had a gun and that leads me to...

exhibit b.

State legislaters in Wisconsin are now launching a bill to allow 8 year olds to use guns to hunt. My LIBERAL leaning home state is proposing it a good idea to let 8 year olds handle a weapon that propels bullets at high speeds into other living creatures. The biggest argument against this: safety. NO KIDDING. The biggest argument for it: hunting licenses have been down this year. What?! Well, let me explain...hunting and fishing licenses pay for conservation programs. And these are programs we need so dearly in our rustic state as people are moving into more urban environments and don't appreciate what rustic is. Okay, fine. But does the money have to come from allowing 8 year olds to shoot guns? Yeah, it doesn't sound so great when you phrase it like that. Might I also add that it was in Wisconsin in 2004 where 5 hunters were killed ON PURPOSE over an argument about a deer stand. Case in point: people are stupid. And giving stupid people guns makes no sense.

Yes lets allow 8 year olds to handle guns. At least that way we can anticipate them having them in daycare centers and schools and take proper precautions a head of time.

uncomfortable bachelor pad

2006-01-24T14:52:00.000-05:00

okay, so i couldn't resist the urge to add this blog and think it would be wise for you all to check it out. if you don't watch the bachelor on ABC mondays start, and then check out the bachelor recap on tuesday and prepare to laugh your pretty little head off.

for those of you who haven't tuned in to see who the author of above blog calls "Dr. McHottie" (which thinking about it must originate from the nickname Dr. McDreamy aquired by Patrick Dempsey's character on Grey's Anatomy) and his fauning ladies you really have no idea what you are missing. its like trav once told me about watching 'must love dogs,' watch it just so you know how bad it is. seriously, does anyone else agree with me when i say that this season of the bachelor is quite possibly the worst thing ever aired on cable television? and yet, just like laguna beach, i cannot seem to tear my eyes from it. it's pure pain and agony, uncomfortably awkward. jessi, much of the same qualities you find appealing in the office. only these are REAL people we are talking about. and you can only help but think to yourself, 'LORD, if i ever become so desperate please just take me as your own as clearly i have come to the end of my existance."

but i cannot stress enough that this blog will put a smile on your face. so pop some popcorn and sit back and enjoy...

here we go...

2006-01-24T10:27:00.000-05:00

ewww my blogs suck lately.

i wasn't going to be this person simply because EVERYONE else is being this person but awww hell, i'll be this person.

pittsburgh's going to the superbowl (notice however, that i did not feel the need to capitalize or make fun bright colors?). this is a good thing, don't get me wrong. its just that i hate bandwagon fans (don't even start with me Badger bandwagon fans because you all really SUCK) and i so evidently have become one in the last two weeks. gross. i've always said that growing up in Wisconsin either makes you a crazed packer junkie or makes you rue the day professional football emerged (or made you root for every team that was playing the packers just to piss your mom off). me, it made me hate professional football. of course that was only after i fully understood that teachers get paid nothing to control a classroom of screaming children while football players make more in one season than i'll see in my lifetime to voluntarily get beat up. before i realized that these people actually got PAID for this i cheered for teams like the cowboys. i knew people hated this. i was such a brat. but then when i got to high school and college i was thankful for living in a state where professional football governed the mood of 90% of the population on monday mornings because it meant that sundays i could visit the mall or the grocery store and actually get things accomplished.

now i'm not gonna lie here. i had NO idea how big of a football town pittsburgh was when i moved here. when you live in wisconsin and you hate professional football all you know is that the state believes that lambeau field is the vatican, green and gold are sacred colors, and brett favre is God. what's the point of knowing anything else about the NFL? and then people started asking me: "are you a steelers fan?" my response: "i'm from wisconsin. i hate the packers. do you actually think that if i'm from wisconsin and i hate the packers that i'd be in support of any other NFL team? the Badgers. they're my boys. lets talk NCAA." and i started realizing that the black and gold is just as crazy, if not more so, than the green and gold. amen, i still have sundays to run errands successfully. i TRIED unsuccessfully to watch games. i tended to fall asleep before half time. i tried to scream at the tv, tried to yell at bettis, and roethlesberger. but when your heart isn't in it, its just not worth the effort.

and then came the playoffs which is ulitmately the same as march madness in my mind. fail to watch an entire season and get caught up on the teams that really matter and pick your loyalties from them. i hate basketball. but wisconsin generally makes it to the big dance and hell, i'll support that. miraculously enough, pittsburgh somehow makes it in with a wild card long after greenbay had blown any chances of seeing the inside of ford field. and i watched them beat indianapolis, slated by many to win the whole thing, narrowly after bettis fumbed and ben tackled. and the last minute of that game reminded me so intently of what it is that i love about college football. the upsets, the narrow wins in the last seconds. and suddenly its not such a long shot anymore. and i have this strange feeling inside me that feels a little bit like excitement. and then the steelers take home the AFC title. and now its all over. i've succombed. the wagon rolled by and i jumped on it. i'm suddenly screaming so loud i've lost my voice, smiling at the sight of terrible towels. wishing i too was in the southside celebrating in the street with the thousands of other fans. i have become he epitomy of what i hate. but i guess we all need to take baby steps and start somewhere right? and i've never been one to leave my team high and dry when they are floundering so lets assume that i'm considering myself a true fan. it just took a couple of wins to get me there. besides, the superbowl is so much more interesting when you actually have something to watch other than the commercials, which quite frankly are just not that great anymore. does anybody have an extra terrible towel?

but shhhhh, please don't tell greenbay. they will not think its fair that the 96 and 97 NFC titles were not enough to convert me.

sex and the blogoshere

2006-01-20T09:32:00.000-05:00

I've added a new blog to my blog friends area. I would like to say that I urge you all to check it out but i fear some of you may not appreciate the content of what is being offered. At any rate feel free to check out 'fabulous females' for a community post a la sex and the city style.

ode to my friends. by amanda

2006-01-17T09:45:00.000-05:00

i thought maybe i'd spent all post gushing about how completely fabulous my boyfriend is, but greg assured me he would kick my ass if i did such a thing and lets be honest, i never even liked it when my friends did it in their away messages let alone me do it in my blog. so i decided instead to gush about how fantastically wonderful my FRIENDS are. if you are not a friend of mine, i appologize. this blog is going to suck for you. eh, it might suck even if you are my friend though.

there are holidays i detest. valentines day and new years for one. i've never had a steller time on either one of those days. but my birthday, well my birthday has always pretty much kicked ass. maybe i'm just easy to please but it seems like everything aligns every year on january 16th. this year was no different thanks to all the lovely people in my life.

my weekend started out with a shopping trip by margaret and myself. we found awesome country themed t-shirts on sale for $4! and cowboy hats to match. see photo below for our themed attire. off to saddle ridge we went to celebrate in style the birthday's of amanda, maria and greg where i picked up on two line dances and am so excited about the prospect of returning to test out my new dancing skills. many props to the crew who once again did not allow for a boring or uneventful evening.

saturday was more low key (aside from the 6 hours of work i had to do). greg and i collected janice and drove out to the mills to meet tom for 18 holes of indoor glow in the dark mini golf. as usual a good time was had with greg and tom and the addition of janice complimented them quite nicely. then we made a trip to houlihans to pay margy a visit.

sunday. see any of margy's sunday posts for a synopsis of the mood on sunday. church was wonderful as always and a fellowship hour followed to celebrated a member turning 90. and let me just say that for 90 she still has her head on straight. i can only hope to be that with it when i'm 90. after church margaret and i went to greg's to watch the steelers game in peace and quiet. WOW steelers! that's all i have to say. i may have jumped on the bandwagon after sunday's game. we ate some pizza and had some wine and cookies and greg gave us his best impression of his downstairs neighbor's annoying hacking cough. usual sunday night festivities with janice, and this semester margaret too!

birthday morning commenced with a wake up call from boyfriend wishing me happy birthday shortly followed by phone call from parents wishing me happy birthday, then best friend wishing me happy birthday. this is all before the hour of 10am. i love you people with all my heart but let a girl sleep in on her day off! the day progressed with some laundry and a target and old navy run. PS the WHOLE store of old navy is on sale for like a gazzillion percent off. birthday songs were sung to me by neighbor lori, fellow birthday boy greg, and trav who just moved his voice up and down with words ala will ferrell in elf style. many more phone calls followed and i'm touched that all of you remembered and thought of me as i enter this harrowing stage of my midtwenties (but no one remembered to get me a pony). Greg picked me up for a suprise dinner at PF changs followed by dessert at cold stone. He completely threw me for a loop when he led me to the movie theatre and made me keep my eyes closed until we got in so i wouldn't know we were seeing 'walk the line' until it started. and did i mention he got me the most thoughtful gift ever? but you'll have to ask me about it if you want to know what it is. okay, so i gushed on greg a little bit. i promise i'm done now.

so here's the deal. i have wonderful wonderful people in my life and if i ever complain about being lonely please kick me in the face and tell me i'm stupid. thanks.

you all are bored arent you? yeah, well that's why i've provided links for you on the side now isn't it?

YEE HAW!

2006-01-17T09:31:00.000-05:00

things to smile about today:

2006-01-13T14:29:00.000-05:00

-the newest in the coke flavors: diet black cherry vanilla. sooooo yummy. of course it does still have that taste of rum like vanilla coke has but other than that yummy!

-that its currently 66 degrees and sunny out. on January 13th.

-that even though i have to be at work at 8:30am tomorrow i do not have to work on monday.

-janice and margaret are cooking me dinner tonight.

-i will save a horse and possibly ride a cowboy tonight at saddle ridge ;)

-the tile work is finally complete in the hall outside my office which means random people will no longer walking through it and there will be no more drafts from people leaving doors open.

-margy and i will walk home from work together.

-greg does not have to go to work at 1am.

down with doba

2006-01-10T13:48:00.000-05:00

i've recently decided that chipotle is about 8 times better than qdoba. i know that as a wisconsin alum this is pretty much the ultimate faux pas to say being that qdoba is open until 3am and fed many a hungry drunk mouth among my circle of alcoholic friends but its true. though i think it has something to do with the meat. chipotle's chicken just tastes fresher. less burned. well today i was given one more reason to prefer chipotle over qdoba. ames sent a community email to kel and myself this morning discussing how she had not had mexican food in chicago until last night with the exception of chipotle. of the course the mention of the delectable word sent my salivary glands into a tizzy in pure classical conditioning mode and i decided i must have chipotle for lunch. unfortunately the state of pennsylvania has not caught on to the greatness of many things like noodles, chins, and of course chipotle so i had to settle for second best qdoba. but, as the following story clearly supports, chipotle or no chipotle, i will not be patroning qdoba for some time.

1:10pm-walk into qdoba. there is a line. line is not moving.
1:17pm-order food. food girl does not hear my order correctly. is fully prepared to give me beans. gross.
1:18pm-told by food lady that they are waiting on my veggies to sautee. will be finished shortly.
1:18pm-another food lady puts salsa and cheese and sour cream on naked fajita and puts it back at veggie station to await more veggies.
1:19pm-strange food man, who is OBVIOUSLY new and CLUELESS, begins to remove my naked fajita and bring it to the register. i lean over the glass and kindly explain to him that i'm waiting for veggies.
1:20pm-veggies just about finished. strange food man takes the wrong veggies (think squash and zuchinni) and puts them on fajita while i open my mouth and utter in slow motion "nooooooooooo." idiot. wrong vegetables. food man procceeds to pick off wrong vegetables and replace with right vegetables. and surely he was unable to s uccessfully remove all.
1:21pm-i pay for my food, which is getting cold by this point.
1:21pm-i go to utensil station. no forks. how does one eat a naked burrito with no fork? i tell clerk at register who screams to someone in the back to retrieve forks.
1:22pm-fork guy comes to my rescue. however while in the middle of retrieving forks random dude from oakland comes in and strikes up conversation. fork guy leaves me high and dry, no fork, cold food.
1:25pm. finally have fork. have found table. begin eating food. food sucks. and i can still taste the wrong vegetables that are on it. and its cold.

no doba. for a long time. period.

decided to go to mcdonalds to get myself an oreo mcflurry to help me feel better about my lunch expedition. apparently the pedal thingie that they use to blend it must have been pushed under something. so the woman gets down on all fours ont eh floor and pulls it out. then proceeds to finish my mcflurry, without first washing her hands. ewww. when she gave it to me there were lots of oreo chunks on top leading me to believe she did not mix it well. when i pulled the top off and put my spoon in the cookie bits got all over my desk. greg informed me that mcdonalds is basically just packaged garbage anyway. but i like mcflurrys (insert whiny voice here). i think maybe its just God telling me to stop eating crap. well God, point noted. thanks much.

down south for the winter

2006-01-09T11:54:00.000-05:00

my parents just called me to inform me that they've arrived safely in florida. they call me because i ask them to in order to not stress out about the long hours they drive on the dangerous highways of tennesee and florida. but there is a huge part of me that wants to punch them in the face every time i talk to them in the months between january and march. here is why:

mom: just calling to tell you we arrived safely. we just got done grocery shopping.
me: thanks for calling. how is the weather?(why i ask this i do not know).
mom: 74 degrees and sunny. not a cloud in the sky. its so blue.
me: really? its 50 here.
mom: probably not sunny though huh?
me: you guessed it. but i think i saw it for a little bit this morning.
mom: oh, well you're at work right? i'll let you go.

i love how they always sound so smug. haha we're in sunny florida and you are still in winterland. we are relaxing at the beach in the middle of january and you're sitting at your desk without any windows. in fact they refer to wisconsin (still their current residence and home for the majority of the year) as 'up north.' i'm sorry, but 'up north' is crivitz, or rhinelander, or somewhere else north of green bay that is grossly uninhabited except for the months between june and august when the fishing is good or during deer hunting season. 'up north' is hardly sheboygan. sometimes they call me up on a wednesday night a little intoxicated just to say hi. they pass the phone around their jovial circle of retired friends who all insist on asking me what's new in my life telling me the weather's great, i should stop down and see them sometime. more likely than not, they'll call me on monday to wish me a happy birthday but then immediately tell me that its 78 degrees and sunny and the hallelujah chorus is playing in the background while the mystical animals of the flora and fauna dance around in jubilee. and i'll resist very hard the urge to shout back at them, 'yeah, i turned 24 today. how's it feel to be 55?" because not only am i a good daughter but i'd rather not do anything to jeopardize the free room and board i have in the tropics...even if it is in retirement USA.

somber moments

2006-01-09T10:55:00.000-05:00

kate and maria, if you don't update your blogs soon i might really cry.

as for me, i'll work on finding something resourceful to say by the end of the day (hey, i'm a poet and i don't know it).

new links, more procrastination

2006-01-05T11:16:00.000-05:00

i've added two more links to help you all procrastinate in the column on the left. the first is some blog radio thing that i ran across randomly. the second is a ginormous picture of a sun that my wonderful boyfriend (eh, we'll call him that for lack of a better term) sent to me in an effort to provide some sanity in the drabness of pittsburgh winter.

me and MLK

2006-01-04T14:31:00.000-05:00

its holly's birthday today. yay holly. happy birthday. i'll call her later and wish her well. the enthusiasm will convey better over the phone. holly's 24 today. sucker. a whole 12 days before me (did you all do that math? january 16th. i would like a new pony, please). she's 24 which means she's entered her mid twenties. amy turned 24 way back in august. she's old. but i told her that she could say she was 23 until i turned 24. that way we'd both enter our mid twenties together. and so i was thinking about this today. because holly's birthday always makes me think about my own being that its 12 days later (just in case the math challenge slipped past you all again, january 16th...). and here is what the most exciting thing about my birthday is: this year its a paid holiday. thank you Martin Luther King Jr. i dont think i actually care about being exactly one year older than i was the first time i saw a bright florescent light. i've been able to legally smoke, gamble, drink, drive, watch porn, and have sex for a while now and i still don't get a cheaper rate on my car insurance. (disclaimer, just because i'm legally allowed to do the aforementioned subjects does not me i practice them, i am an angel afterall). actually i think i will just forget its my birthday this year. i always seem to forget how old i am anyway because, with the exception of margy (i love you margy) my friends in pittsburgh are either older or younger than me. thus this year if you so desire to buy me a pony on january 16th, in lieu of wishing me a happy birthday, wish me a happy Martin Luther King Jr. day.

everybody's changing and i don't feel the same

2005-12-24T03:18:00.000-05:00

some people never change. or maybe its that they do change but not in the way we expect, want, or think they should so its just easier to think that they haven't changed. nothing spells that out quite like a night at a packed bar in your hometown before any major holiday. i am fortunate enough to only experience one holiday a year like this. i fear that if i witnessed any more i might really start to doubt humanity. i tolerate it, maybe even like it because its the one time a year that i see EVERYONE. people who i start to think have fallen off the face of the planet suddenly appear out of nowhere. they give me hugs and don't let go even though i expected that the hugs were forever over. the jokes resume, the 'i miss you's' exchanged. i wasn't expecting to see him, even though a little part of me wanted to. its so hard to believe that its been 4 years since things were right. 4 years since he was the person i thought i was going to marry. 4 years since he hugged me the way he hugged me tonight. but though i ask about him, tell him that i hope he is doing well, that i believe in him, he never asks of me. never utters the words "how are you doing? how are things out east? i'm sorry its been so long since we've been okay with each other." he makes the usual comments with his friends to show his macho side, his pretend college student side. when i ask what happend to school he tells me he's on the van wilder plan and i look at him with disapproval because i know that he was and is so much more than that if he could only see the potential he has. and then he says something that hurts me, and he sees the hurt in my eyes and he gives me a hug again and squeezes me tight and doesn't let go. or maybe its that i just tell yourself that he doesn't let go because its easier that way. easier than admitting to myself that there is still a tiny bit of pain there. i tell him not to be such a stranger, that its nice talking to him. he tells me he won't. tells me that i should call him...i have his number. but really, what's the point? things have always been cyclical and in a few months it'll be back to square one, fighting. its what we do best afterall. he leaves. possibly for the first time in 4 years not angry at me. he leaves with my phone number in his phone with his phone number in my phone. he leaves, but not before one last hug. there were too many to count tonight. and i stay and think about how for a brief moment it was good again. but then reality sets in and i realize that keane said it best, 'everybody's changing and i dont feel the same.' i'll keep his number in my phone for a while, at least until i get a new one and shift numbers around again. and i'll look at it from time to time and think about calling it. but for now it has to be enough to know that my bitterness left with the change, and that's enough for me.

"chicago?" "no, uh, sheboygan. we had a couplea hits up there"

2005-12-20T18:31:00.000-05:00

*classic John Candy moment-Home Alone 1.

well today is it...i'm heading out for the holidays. all that's left to do now is go home and finish the rest of my packing and pick up some yuengling, quality western PA beer, for the fam.

i've said goodbye to margy who is in sunny cali right now. i've said goodbye to janice who will be heading back to the grove in a few short days. i've said goodbye to greg who i hope will find a great deal of happiness in this holiday. i'm still saying goodbye to maria but will think of her on my drive as i listen to Dane Cook-Retaliation. i've said goodbye to my roommate through emails and hope to see her for a few before i head out tomorrow morning. i've said goodbye to matt who will be spending the holiday in Kentucky (?) and a celebratory New Years in Chicago. i look back on the time i've spent out here, especially these past 6 months, and find it amazing that i now have so many people who i will miss for the two weeks i will be gone, how so many positive people have come into my life just when i was beginning to think that new friendships were not possible.

so back to wisconsin i go. a different person than i was a year and a half ago when i left for the first time, a different person than i was a year ago, a different person than i was 6 months ago. but i look forward to the change of scenery, the change of atmosphere, the change of people. i look forward to spending thursday night with my long lost girls, to spending friday night making sheboygan as crazy of a place as we possibly can. i look forward to being with the only people i can ever imagine spending christmas with, my family. but mostly, i look forward to knowing that two weeks from now i will look forward to coming home...to pittsburgh.

perhaps i will blog about the craziness that undoubtably always is sheboygan and my family while i'm there, but if i don't make it to the internet on my parents 56k connection, see you in 2006 blogspot!

cheers, and thanks for reading this year blog friends.

these musicians we like to sometimes call our friends

2005-12-16T15:45:00.000-05:00

i took out the music in my profile. it was starting to annoy even me. if you have some kind of preference to it let me know and i'll put it back.

and onto blog #3 as promised.

in life, if we are lucky, we have defining moments of clarity. the moments when we truly feel God's presence, or the cosmos seem to all have aligned if that is your sort of thing. the moments where we feel that we are where we should be, doing what we should be doing. last night was one of those such moments for me. allow me to share.

i've been crabby lately. very crabby. God bless my wonderful friends who have put up with this unusual nature of mine. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that winter decided to come full blown early and its still a good 15 degrees below the norm here in pittsburgh. but last night i felt it, the sense that everything would be okay.

margs called me last night excited about her boss sending her home from work due to a threat of incliment winter weather. thus this being the 'week of margy' as i've seen her every single day naturally we decided it best to celebrate her rare thursday night off in some format. so off to the club cafe we went to see margy's wonderful friend Kathryn O'Leary (i appologize for those interested i cannot find a website for her) followed by another friend Ben Hardt. As i'm sitting in the lounge type atmosphere with margs listening to these fabulous people sing jazz and play guitar and upright bass and drums i realize that not only is pittsburgh not that bad but it is exactly where i am supposed to be right now at this very moment in time. Ben concludes his set and tells the crowd that he will be touring with Eric James early next year. I look at margy and tell her that i love Eric James and that he is the first person i ever saw play at club cafe. margs looks at me and smiles and says "he went to Grove City too. i know him. i think you and i would have met anyway even if we hadn't met at church." and then i knew that meeting margy, and later meeting her roommate janice was also part of the plan for me. in just two short months (has it really only been two months, girls?) these two have quickly become one of the most prominent features of my life here in pittsburgh.

after the show i sat in silence for a while. margy looked at me and asked what i thought. "thanks for dragging me out in the slush" i said to her. "i knew you'd love it." and as i thought there i thought about all the fantastic musicians like Eric James, Shelly Rollison, Kathryn O'Leary, Ben Hardt, and Matthew Brian Ruddy (aka MistaRuddy) with Matt and probably Kathryn and Shelly soon enough holding a dear place in my heart. I think about all this talent and the fact that i'm sitting right in front of it, watching it grow, watching it be inspired. i think about these people who i know have nothing but great things ahead for them. and i can't help but be in awe. when i left madison i vowed that i would be more involved in the next city i lived in. that it wouldn't just be about the bars and the clubs and the stupid stories the morning after. after i moved here i vowed that i would eventually come to look back on this time with great nostagia knowing that i experienced everything there was to experience.

well i can't think of a better experience than walking up to kathryn after her set and telling her she was awesome and actually know that i will personally see her do great things from there and not just read about it on some website.

"monster" in reverse?

2005-12-16T13:36:00.000-05:00

and now for blog #2.

i was walking home last night at around 6:30 from the bus. its a short walk, maybe 10 minutes tops with the ice covered sidewalks (we've already established people in my neighborhood don't take care of this stuff). there is a female walking about 10 yards behind me and we are both walking as fast as we can without falling on the ice. i'm about 2 houses away from my house when i hear a car pulling up behind me. i hear someone roll down the window and say something to the female behind me. "no thank you" she repies. two seconds later the car pulls up along side me. rolls down window. a female driver leans over her male or female passenger (i can't really tell) and asks me if i need a ride. i do what i've been taught to do in random situations such as these and just keep walking. car keeps driving beside me, woman keeps asking if i need a ride. finally i look at her and say bluntly, "no." and off they drive. in my head i'm thinking "if i had gotten in the car with her where would she have taken me? what kind of crazy cult would they bring me to? how many husbands would i have to please? what if one little word, no, was the difference between me seeing the comfort of my friendship apartment or the inside of some satanic worship ground?" jessi thinks she was just trying to be nice. but even charlize theron pulled off playing a convict who recieved the death penalty, she even won an oscar for it. i guess my mommy always told me never to talk to strangers...

i saw mommy kissing who?

2005-12-16T13:07:00.000-05:00

today there will be 3 blogs. because they all concern different topics and it would not be fair to lump them all together. so there will be three blogs at some point anyway.

the first is christmas related. concerns a christmas song actually. the age old classic "i saw mommy kissing santa claus." its more of an opinion blog than anything for the sake of an argumentamy and i had yesterday regarding the content of the song.

below are snippets of my conversation with amy on this matter.

amy: don't laugh but I think I just figured out the song "I saw mommy kissing santa"
amanda: what?
amanda: like you didnt get it?
amy: i just don't think i ever thought about it
amy: like who santa really was
amanda: and what do you mean you just got who santa really was?
amanda: he was santa
amy: but I thought santa was the dad
amanda: no
amanda: santa was santa
amy: but there is no santa
amanda: but little kids don't know that
amy: but adults do
amanda: you can't read into christmas music. if you use "there is no santa" as a basis for things then no christmas song makes sense. rudolph the red nose reigndeer...nope, frosty the snowman, nope
amy: but I like the song when the dad is santa and the kid thinks his mom is cheating
amanda: yeah but its not really cheating if its santa
amy: how so
amanda: actually come to think of it...going with your he's not real statement, it was cheating but with anotehr man
amy: WHAT! You say it was another man dressed up like santa and not her husband? You are taking this to a whole new level
amanda: that's what i'm suggesting. but i dont think he was dressed up like santa. i think he just looked like santa
amy: what! So mommy was making out with an old guy? Ok, now I think you are crazy and just trying to get a reaction from me. I am going to go with my original thought on this song
amanda: no i'm n ot kidding. you know how when you are little you think every guy with a light beard is santa? he doesn't necessarily have to be old
amy: I think you are wrong
amanda: but he never makes it clear that he is the dad
amy: come on, how many couples do you think have a little thingy christmas eve night in santa and ms. santa like outfits?
amanda: he didnt say anything about mommy being ms santa
amy: I know that, I am just saying that the night invites certain wardrobe choices
amy: you know what I mean....
amanda: i'm sticking with infidelity
amy: I am thinking that mommy has a santa fetish
amanda: honestly in little kids eyes kissing santa is not a big deal
amanda: if my m om would have kissed santa i wouldn't have cared
amanda: you are taking this to a whole new leevel
amanda: i'm talking infidelity and you can't handle that with the kids but you can handle sex disorders?
amanda: like fetishism?
amanda: that's just sick
amy: you are totally wrong and maria and I are correct
amy: but the kid just thinks it is santa, but the mom just likes the santa costume
amy: this is too much for me to handle
amanda: yes, but you are still inviting sexual dysfunction into a christmas song
amy: haha...if you want to phrase it that way
amanda: so we have either infidelity or sexual dysfunction
amanda: you pick
amy: you are introducing infadelity
amanda: either one is horrible
amanda: either way the song is clearly unsuitable for children

so i'm asking you all do devirginize my comments section by explaining to me what you think the lyrics to this christmas (clearly not suitable for children) classic mean. do you agree with me or amy or do you have your own thoughts?

CAT got your tongue? oh wait, your entire body.

2005-12-15T16:09:00.000-05:00

CT scans just might be my demise. oh sure there are a lot of things that seem like they'd be a lot worse. colonoscopies for one. man do those suck, especially when the anesthesia does not seem to be working as it should and you wake up remembering the whole thing. but i'm going to repress that memory for now. some of you who know the neccesity for me to have CT scans may argue with me here and say "well amanda, really if you think about it, the CT scan isn't so bad. i mean its actually helping to control a much worse demise for you. deal with some minor discomfort for a while." to them i might reply "yes, yes, you all have great points. but let me sit here and complain anyway about how much i hate CT scans because right now in this moment it makes me feel better."

many of you i'm sure have never had the pleasure of being placed inside the giant plastic donut. yes, that's how they first described it to me..."its like a donut." don't sugarcoat it. its not like a donut at all. more of a giant cylinder of annoyance. anyway, for those of you who have never had more than a simple x-ray done allow me to explain this proceedure.

first of all it entails being in a hospital. i'm sure everyone can attest to how non functional hospital settings are, especially waiting rooms (i'm sorry margs, i don't mean to attack your home but you've gotta agree with me on this one). you will most likely show up to your appointment 10 minutes early because they ask you to but will of course not even be called to get registered for another half hour. once they get your name and birthday they tell you to have a seat and assure you that someone will be right with you. i'd honestly like to know what "right with you" means because it always takes at least another half hour after that. well hopefully soon a nice nurse comes to get you and asks you again to repeat your name and birthdate and might ask you some other fun questions about how much medication you take, how much you weigh, what your favorite color is, if you could be any superhero who would you be, etc. then she gently informs you that she will need to start your IV. ps, i hate IVs. and i'm even o.k. with needles. i'm o.k. with having blood drawn. i'm o.k. with shots. but when you want to stick and IV in me, NOWAY! so she'll start your IV and give you this smile which is meant to reassure you but you know deep inside it actually means "sucker, glad i'm not your sorry self." and now comes my favorite part. she tells you she's giving you your "drink" now. drink-like its some kind of fruity cocktail or something. no the drink is actually barium....thick white milky barium designed to coat the inside of your stomach to make all your organs show up nice and pretty on the computer screen in the back room. she'll give you instructions to drink two cups of it now, wait 25 minutes and then drink another 4 cups. you dont know this at the time but once you get back into the CT room they will ask you to drink some more. then mrs. nurse asks you if you'd like a straw, even though sucking this through a tiny hole is probably the last thing on your mind.

now you go back into the waiting room and make strange faces as you try to get your 'drink' down and the people around you probably think you have some rare facial muscle disease that you are being examined for. if all goes well in about 45 minutes you'll be on your way to radiology. if not, well they'll just wait for you to finish then.

once back in radiology they place you on the table. the tech asks you AGAIN what your name and birthday are. last you checked you were not in to have your memory assessed. you've remembered not to wear jeans because mr. CT doesn't like metal, but you have forgotten not to wear that damn underwire. they make you take it off. here comes the really fun part. almost like a ride at disney world. they lab tech tells you that the table will move in and out a few times and you will be asked to breathe in and hold it once in a while. no problem. you're a pro at breathing. but then come the questions about allergies and reactions to iodine and other dye. what? oh yeah, and one point we're going to inject you with this dye to help use see things more clearly (isn't that what i drank my 'drink' for?). don't be alarmed but most people feel a very warm sensation in their body when they are injected with this, almost like you are going to the bathroom. the table moves in and out. you breath in and out. and bam! dye goes in. and suddenly your body feels like its on FIRE. your insides feel as if they have spontaneously combusted and exploded but the suface of your skin is fireproof so it will not let the flames out. the computer voice asks you to breath in and hold it again. how can you possibly be expected to do such a task when clearly your lungs have turned into charcol?

about 10 minutes later everything is over. you roll off the table and the tech tells you to drink lots of water. want to flush that dye out of your system. heaven forbid you be walking around with foreign elements in your body all day long. of course all your thinking about is that cramped hungover feeling you now have from your 'drink' and how good a greasy cheeseburger would be right about now. but its only 10:30 in the morning. looks like you'll have to wait a couple hours for that.

I'll be Home for Christmas

2005-12-14T12:41:00.000-05:00

in light of my many friends in recent accidents (well okay there were only actually 2 people, but one person had 2 accidents and knew of another who had an accident), and in light of the fact that in exactly one week i will be on the road back to the midwest i decided to post some winter driving tips courtesy of the weather channel. i do believe that everyone should learn how to drive in winter and despite what you say when you are 16, no it is not better if your birthday is in august so you don't have to deal with winter weather. snow banks will destroy your car just as much as a deer will, spinning out of control donut style is not as fun as riding the teacups at disney world, antilock brakes are awesome but when you are driving on a sheet of ice they will not allow you to stop on a dime, and most of the time i GUARANTEE it is worth the extra 3 minutes to clean ALL of the snow off ALL of you car windows. with your help and mine we will all make it home safely for christmas.

*this public service announcement has been brought to you by ~mandakay and the weather channel. thanks for reading.

Driving safely on icy roads

Decrease your speed and leave yourself plenty of room to stop. You should allow at least three times more space than usual between you and the car in front of you.
Brake gently to avoid skidding. If your wheels start to lock up, ease off the brake.
Turn on your lights to increase your visibility to other motorists.
Keep your lights and windshield clean.
Use low gears to keep traction, especially on hills.
Don't use cruise control or overdrive on icy roads.
Be especially careful on bridges, overpasses and infrequently traveled roads, which will freeze first. Even at temperatures above freezing, if the conditions are wet, you might encounter ice in shady areas or on exposed roadways like bridges.
Don't pass snow plows and sanding trucks. The drivers have limited visibility, and you're likely to find the road in front of them worse than the road behind.
Don't assume your vehicle can handle all conditions. Even four-wheel and front-wheel drive vehicles can encounter trouble on winter roads.

If your rear wheels skid...

Take your foot off the accelerator.
Steer in the direction you want the front wheels to go. If your rear wheels are sliding left, steer left. If they're sliding right, steer right.
If your rear wheels start sliding the other way as you recover, ease the steering wheel toward that side. You might have to steer left and right a few times to get your vehicle completely under control.
If you have standard brakes, pump them gently.
If you have anti-lock brakes (ABS), do not pump the brakes. Apply steady pressure to the brakes. You will feel the brakes pulse -- this is normal.

If your front wheels skid...

Take your foot off the gas and shift to neutral, but don't try to steer immediately.
As the wheels skid sideways, they will slow the vehicle and traction will return. As it does, steer in the direction you want to go. Then put the transmission in "drive" or release the clutch, and accelerate gently.

If you get stuck...

Do not spin your wheels. This will only dig you in deeper.
Turn your wheels from side to side a few times to push snow out of the way.
Use a light touch on the gas, to ease your car out.
Use a shovel to clear snow away from the wheels and the underside of the car.
Pour sand, kitty litter, gravel or salt in the path of the wheels, to help get traction.
Try rocking the vehicle. (Check your owner's manual first -- it can damage the transmission on some vehicles.) Shift from forward to reverse, and back again. Each time you're in gear, give a light touch on the gas until the vehicle gets going.

look into my crystal ball and i will tell you what you've seen

2005-12-13T12:35:00.000-05:00

today's blog was inspired by an entry in november on chad's blog.

visit futureme.org and write yourself a letter to be delivered to your email at any date in the future you choose. the main purpose of this site is to be a sort of internet time capsule. established in 2002 it has already delivered many emails to patient people anxiously wanting to remember what their hopes, dreams, thoughts, worries of the past were. if you are like me you keep a journal. maybe like me you are bad at it, maybe unlike me you update it regualrly. if you are like me you have a blog, and you try to update it regularly but maybe that doesn't always happen. if you keep a journal and are like me you frequently look back on older entries and find it hard to believe that those very thoughts were in your head at that time. but i tend to write in my journal at night before bed. and most of the time i'm simply too tired to take the time to write everything out that is on my mind. how great would it be if you could keep a journal electronically, in essence send an email to yourself periodically, knowing that it would be sealed until your designated time? its like a blog, only private...kinda.

i honestly hope that if i email myself, i will look back on it in 5 years and breathe a sigh of relief that my self-published worries were fruitless. i guess i'll just have to wait until 2010 to find out.

a photo journey of saturday

2005-12-12T13:33:00.000-05:00

saturday afternoon i went climbing with matt. i'd never been climbing before but matt is a hardcore outdoor enthusiast so he is completely revved about the idea but keeps pleading to me to not drop him. this doesn't help my nerves by the way. well turns out that the gym we went to wouldn't actually let us top-rope because i'm not familiar with how to do it, i guess they needed me to take some into class that costs like $30 or something and matt was pretty confident that he could just show me how to do it. we've since found a gym that will allow me to do it. anyway, we just decided to boulder which meant climbing lower walls without a harness. i tried one wall and was like "yeah, this sucks. this is not fun. how do people actually enjoy this." but the persistant person that i am i smile at matt and say "well let me try another wall. i don't really like this one." and of course tell him i'm having a good time. about an hour later i'm completely into it. actually even trying to challenge myself a little bit and follow the trails they have marked out on the walls. and yeah, then it was actually fun and after we were finished and my hands were severely callused and the balls of my feet hurt too much to walk on i actually wanted to go again. well two days later i cannot walk, and am in severe need of a massage but still i'm ready to go. matt's got his hopes set high on me being able to top rope next time but i don't know if i'm ready for the height of the wall, or the notion that i'm actually in control of matt's final destination.

and in other stories...saturday night margy and janice had a last minute holiday soiree at their apartment which turned out fantastic! and the guests were even courteous and took their shoes off...

i probably had too much wine...

but janice and i finally got a picture together...

as did matt and i...

and santa even made a visit!

so as you can see, all in all, saturday was a good day.

a ring on her finger

2005-12-09T12:28:00.000-05:00

kate got engaged. yay kate! this wasn't really a surprise but i'm excited to actually see a ring on her finger now. and i'm looking at the picture of her beautiful ring and i notice how nicely groomed her hand is. and this worries me. not that kate's hand is nicely groomed but that mine isn't. when (if) i get engaged what happens when i need to take pictures to show friends and family? i was telling maria yesterday that i'm going to have to hire a hand double. as most of you who know me even a little bit know i have long since had the nervous habit of biting and picking my finger nails. they definitely look much better than they once did but my nails still do not extend past the end of my fingers and my cuticles are all ripped up. plus my fingers are really knuckly (is knuckly a word) and crooked. people, amy especially, have been trying to get me to knock off the obnoxious habit for years. nothing works. i just pick at things. i dont know what it is.

so who wants to be my hand double for the gorgeous ring that my future boyfriend/fiance/husband gives me?

maybe i should invest in a pair of ice skates

2005-12-07T09:52:00.000-05:00

...see Margy's blog for details of my eventful monday evening...

and now onto other matters...

so seriously, isn't there some kind of city ordinance about keeping the sidewalks free of ice? i remember in madison there was some kind of fine that you were subject to if you didnt shovel and salt within a few hours of snow and ice. but apparently here in pittsburgh that is just an effort that people don't want to take. my apartment steps are a lawsuit waiting to happen. as is the majority of the sidewalk that i walk on on my way to the bus stop. honestly, some of us are not equipped with the grace and skill to walk on pure ice.

and also, the light on my floor in my apartment building is burned out again...

annoyed.

blog blog blog

2005-11-29T09:16:00.000-05:00

previous posts can be found at http://mscheesehead.diaryland.com